ok another night of mindless pacing full of over analyzed and exceptionally important thoughts.... I feel all turbulent or tumultuous or tormented or something tonight, not sure how i feel but it seems to start with a T. I think i have too much thinking time between the hours of 9pm and 1am these days with my time zone change and loss of late night companionship. I do better in my own head when i am thinking about someone else and not myself , i think. "HA" to steal from my beloved k. 

I've been reading my favorite LJ's person's journal again tonight, one of my favorite all time pastimes. And as usual it has inspired lots and lots of emotion. I so want to to have known this person for always and my jealously wants every one of their experiences good bad and otherwise to be with me. I am beyond amused, inspired and in lust with nearly every word on this journal and it tears me to shreds and fills me with awe and love simultaneously.

I am way too much to digest for human consumption. Maybe stabbing someone in the liver with a butter knife would relieve some of the pressure.